So I finally got a new mapping session for my cochlear implant!

Lost already?

A mapping session is where they reprogram my cochlear implant. It’s best to get it reprogramed every once a while so when my brain gets used to the sounds & volume then I can go in for another session to increase and adjust the program.

So anyways, about a month ago I got a brochure in the mail from the company of my cochlear implant (Advanced Bionics) about a new program called ClearVoice where it eliminates a lot of background noise so speech is more clear and easier to process/understand. They did a video clip (click on video demos) showing how it sounds if you’re curious.

So I immediately called my cochlear implant doctor’s office to schedule for an appointment. I met with the audiologist that works for the doctor and we went into her office. She threw me off at first because her voice was so high I wasn’t sure if she was doing that because I was deaf and thought it was easier for me to understand her….which it definitely was not helping at all!

She asked me to take my hearing aid off for the session and had me take my cochlear implant off too. She had to connect my cochlear implant to the program on her laptop.

I explained to her how the volume control was ridiculous. The most comfortable I could have it on was at 7AM of the wheel. She said it should be on at noon. So she turned it on to ask me if this was a comfortable setting and I jerked and immediately grabbed the cochlear implant off. It was extremely loud! I was surprised she didn’t have it on low to be safe then slowly increase it. So after a while we finally got it to be at noon.

I also asked her if she had a new stronger magnet for my cochlear implant because the one I had wasn’t strong enough. It kept falling off especially when people hug me or if I was laying down. So now I’ve got a stronger magnet and just that makes me happy!

So we proceeded with reprogramming my cochlear implant. I have 3 programs on my cochlear implant and she explained that she was going to have the program #1 be with background noise, program #2 with some background noise and program #3 with VERY LITTLE background noise.

So today my co-workers and I went out for lunch and I was finally able to test it by having it on program #3. Seriously, it made a big difference. I could hardly hear the background noise. I heard some but it was so quiet that I could ignore it easily and focus on speech and understanding my co-workers. But in order to not hear background noise, I had to turn my hearing aid down or off. I could really hear everything they were saying but it doesn’t mean I understood everything. I still have to lip-read to understand them.

Even when I’m driving home and have music blaring in the car with it on program #3, I can’t really hear the traffic! Looove it!

ClearVoice is AMAZING and I’m so excited! It makes me want to wear my cochlear implant everyday now.

Being deaf is frustrating sometimes. Of course I knew that…I always have. But it was easier growing up where schools provided interpreters and being around deaf people more. Even friends learned how to sign so they could communicate with me… although they still talked to me but they would finger-spell words or sign with me if they didn’t want other people to know what we were talking about. Also when we were kids, we usually played a lot that we didn’t do a lot of talking.

College was a blast. I went to Rochester Institute of Technology where they had a deaf program so interpreters were provided and I lived in a dorm full of deaf people. It was so much fun and we all had it easy there.

Now it’s not like that anymore. I have never had an interpreter at work before. I go days without seeing deaf people. I also even go days without using sign language sometimes. I’m at work all day and when I come home, I don’t usually sign with Tyler since he can hear and understand me just fine.

Being able to sign and listen to conversations in sign language is so easy. I can easily be distracted and still understand what someone is saying to me with sign language. While on the other hand, with hearing people- I have to really pay attention so I understand what they’re saying that sometimes I don’t have time to process it before I can talk.

Some people are very easy to understand because of how they talk. Some others are really difficult to lip-read and understand. It can be difficult when they keep moving their head while talking, look away, talk so fast or change their tone to talk quietly. Also when people laugh while another person is still talking…that can be really difficult since there’s too much going on that I’m not understanding anymore.

Basically…it’s like putting a puzzle together when it comes to understanding people. I’m not giving up and I’m aware that this is something I have to live with for the rest of my life. But I hate how I feel like a burden to people sometimes. I hate that they probably wouldn’t want to tell me something because it wouldn’t be worth repeating or whatever.

I have two amazing co-workers at work who I talk and eat lunch with everyday. They have been supportive of my deafness by repeating things I missed or just clarifying something that someone else said to me that they overheard a conversation between me and a broker. As much as I really appreciate it and am thankful that they do that for me, I wish they didn’t have to do that. It makes me feel “small” sometimes.

I guess it just would be easier if everyone knew sign language. :)

I just needed to get that all out and now I feel better. Now I don’t want anyone to be feeling sorry for me because that’s not what I want. I’m sure everyone has their own struggles with certain things and this is the story of my struggle.

A few months ago I lost an extra magnet piece that I had on my cochlear implant because of my hair. I need two magnets so my cochlear implant won’t easily fall off. It’s not fun hearing then all of a sudden I can’t hear anymore whenever I touch my hair or hug someone.

I also have a “special” direct connect cord that I can connect to my cochlear implant and plug in my iPhone so I can listen to music. I do this a lot at work so I pretty much only use my cochlear implant if I want to listen to music. Lately my direct connect cord has not been working. I have to wiggle it or have it placed in a certain way for it to work. So annoying that this morning I went online to buy a new cord. $25 for a new cord….okay, fine with me. But then I looked around into buying a new power gel (battery) because I should have four power gels but I lost one a few years ago. Each one of them only last 8 (or less) hours before charging again. So guess how much it costs for one power gel? $165! Being deaf is expensive. I didn’t buy it but I probably will need to later on.

Anyways, so this morning I called the doctor’s office who did my cochlear implant surgery back in 2006. I asked for a mapping session and they told me I need a referral from my primary doctor so I can have it covered by insurance. So I hope I can get this sorted out soon so I can get a mapping session done. I’d love to have a new map added to my cochlear implant so maybe I’ll be able to hear background noise and high pitch sounds.

Know how I know I can’t really some sounds that I should be hearing? Well, as I was driving home one day I turned my hearing aid off so I could practice hearing with my cochlear implant on only. I had the music blaring in the car then all of a sudden a car swerved in and cut me off. I yelled a bad word and then realized I couldn’t hear myself say the whole word. Instead I only heard myself say hole. So yeah, this is the story that pushed me to get a mapping session done! :)

P.S. You should go check out my friend, Sean Forbes’s music video (I’m Deaf) in sign language. Also check out the teaser of the new music video that’s coming out soon with Marlee Matlin in it (Let’s Mambo).

I was curious about your cochlear implants.  When did you get them?  How do you like them?  And anything else about them a hearing person might not get.  - E

It was 2006 when I decided I wanted to get a cochlear implant after talking to some of my closest friends who have cochlear implants. The biggest reason that convinced me to get it the summer of 2006 was the fact that the surgery would be covered by my parents’ insurance and if I waited until I graduated from college then it wouldn’t be covered. We found a doctor and immediately met with him in Arizona and after becoming a qualified candidate, we scheduled a date for the surgery which was July 12, 2006. Some deaf people are not qualified to have the surgery. It all depends on the hearing test, speech ability and if they would benefit from it.

Some deaf people choose to get two cochlear implants – but I chose to only get one and chose the worst side (left ear) because I wasn’t wearing my hearing aid in my left ear anymore. It is important when choosing which side because once the surgery is done, there is NO hearing left at all in that ear. I even tried putting my hearing aid in my left ear a few weeks after the surgery and I couldn’t hear a thing.

I could not hear immediately after the surgery because I didn’t have the device. The cochlear implant has two parts to it. The doctor surgically put one part of the device inside my head then in order to hear I have to wear a ear piece (sort of like a hearing aid) to hear.

A few weeks after surgery, I went back in to have my cochlear implant turned on. I still enjoy wearing it from time to time mostly when I want to listen to music. I am trying to use it more since it really benefits me when I’m at work.

I hear a lot better now in terms of sounds being more clear… like birds chirping outside, laundry machine when I am in another room…. but most people often think that this means I can understand people now which is not true. Understanding people comes with practice and it takes time.

Are there different sign languages you’ve come across (I’ve seen two-handed and one-handed signing), and what are the big differences? – Emily

Yes, there are so many different sign languages all over the world. I grew up learning Sign Exact English (SEE) which my parents believed was the best way to learn how to speak and write English. Manual signs are used in exact English word order with all the endings like “ing”. When I was in junior high school, I met other deaf people who used American Sign Language (ASL). ASL is known for having its own grammar syntax that differs from English. ASL is actually more animated than SEE.

There are some signs where it requires two hands and some others don’t. Sometimes we get lazy and sign with one hand usually when we fingerspell words out.

You mentioned your sister has the same hearing loss, but your parents are hearing.  Is the cause of hearing loss genetic? If so, what are the chances of you and Tyler having a child with the same hearing loss, presuming it works that way? - Robin

I wish our family had a formal research done to find out how this occurred and what the chances are for me and my sister in the future. As far as we know, I’m the first deaf person on both sides of my families. Also because my sister is deaf too, it is obvious that both of my parents have recessive genes (based deafness).

So Tyler and I don’t know if he has a recessive deaf gene as well and because of that, we don’t know if it’s likely that we’ll have deaf children or not. I think it would be a fun surprise as we really don’t care if our children are deaf or not.

Is it ever difficult for you to keep up with movies/TV? Like, do you ever find that by the time you’ve read the captions, it’s too late to watch the picture, too? – Suburban Sweetheart

Not at all, because I’m so used to it that I don’t find myself reading line to line. It’s more like reading the captions while watching the picture. I have never found myself missing anything on television. Sometimes the captioning will get in the way like if we’re watching the news and there are headlines on the bottom. Usually when that happens, we’ll pause the show to read the headlines without the captioning in the way. I don’t even acknowledge that I’m reading the captions if that makes sense.

I find it more annoying when TV shows or movies are not closed captioned.  Or even worse…when the captioning is scrambled up.

What is the one thing that you wish that hearing people would do to make your life easier? Talk slower? Enunciate more? – Hope

Talk slower but nnooottt……tttthhhiiiissss….sssllloooowww. Sometimes I find it helpful when people do the obvious gestures while talking to me. Normally I can understand people but it is harder for me to understand people if they’re not looking at me, cover their mouths, or have a mustache, or talk through their teeth. I’m not afraid to ask people to repeat or write down what they said. I appreciate it when people do make the effort to make sure I understand!

Were you ever ashamed of it, like your sister seems to be? If so, what got you to embrace it? – Stephany

I wasn’t ashamed of my deafness. Although I was embarrassed to be seen signing in public or have people realize I’m deaf and stare at me. My parents would sign to me in public and sometimes I’d catch someone staring at us so I would tell my parents to stop signing. I got so tired of it that I started to stare back at these people who were staring at me until they stopped staring at me. I realize that they might be fascinated by sign language or the fact that we’re deaf but still it’s not polite to stare or at least don’t make it obvious!

I grew up being immersed into both the deaf and hearing communities so I enjoyed having a balance with both. My sister on the other hand didn’t have the same experience as I did.

We moved to Arizona when she was really young so she pretty much grew up mainstreamed in a hearing school. I think she has had more frustrations as a deaf person and because of that maybe she wish she was hearing so life would be easier for her.

Have you ever had an encounter with a hearing person in which the hearing person became annoyed because of your deafness? – Megan

I used to work at The Gap in college for 2 months (seasonal job) and this was the perfect place for people getting annoyed with me.

One day while I was folding clothes and putting them out, I thought I heard something over the music that was playing in the store so I looked around me and there was a woman behind me. She looked frustrated and said, “Hello!?!?” with a mean tone in her voice. I was quick to apologize and explain to her that I was deaf and could not hear her and asked her nicely to repeat her question. She rolled her eyes and looked around and asked if there was someone else she could ask because she didn’t want to deal with me.

A common thing that happened a lot when I was in middle school was a lot of my friends or soccer buddies got annoyed with me when I’d ask them to repeat, repeat and repeat what they were saying because I just wasn’t understanding them. The annoying thing was that they didn’t realize how annoying it was for ME to not understand and have them get annoyed at something I can’t control. They never went out of their way to write down what they were saying and instead would just say, “nevermind… it wasn’t that important”. A lesson was learned from that situation and now if I need to, I will ask the person to clarify what they said by writing it down on paper.

I hope my answers didn’t confuse anyone. If you have more questions, please feel free to comment and let me know. I’ll be more than happy to answer any questions you may have.

Is Tyler deaf and how much can he hear?

He’s hard of hearing….but honestly I don’t know what he can’t hear. He can speak very well, talk on the phone and does not wear his hearing aid. When I wear my cochlear implant there are some things I probably can hear better & more clear than he can hear but still he can identify the sounds and where they’re coming from. A lot of times I find myself asking him what that sound is and he would tell me it’s the washing machine, birds chirping outside and et cetera.

Do you both sign all the time?

No, we don’t sign all the time. We both can talk and since Tyler can hear very well, I usually talk with him and he will talk AND sign with me. I love how I can easily talk out-loud in the dark and Tyler will understand me…but if he says something back to me, I usually don’t understand him. Sometimes we play a game where I’ll try to read what he is signing by putting my hands on his hands and usually that doesn’t work. If all fails, we use the light on our iPhones or just turn the dang lights on if it’s that important!

This is the same way with my parents too (they’re hearing). They both sign and talk with me but I never sign back to them since they can’t really read sign language opposed to being able to sign. I’m fortunate to have parents who know how to sign since there are a lot of parents that don’t know sign language at all. My parents learned sign language when I was younger and throughout the years some signs have changed and it’s my fault for not correcting them. So pretty much my sister and I have gotten used to their signs….they even made up some of them!

Your sister is deaf too?

Yep! We have the same hearing loss but she has had more practice with talking on the phone and lip-reading since she doesn’t really have any exposure to the deaf community. She uses an interpreter in school though.

She is totally the opposite of me when it comes to being deaf. She always has to have her hair down so it covers her hearing aids. She doesn’t sign that much and when she does…she complains that she can’t sign and talk at the same time. I’m hoping she will outgrow that phase and sign more and not be so ashamed of her deafness.

So you rely on sign language to understand people all the time?

No, not all the time. If i had a choice, it would be so much easier if everybody signed! I can still lip-read and hear when people talk to me. I may not understand everything that is being said and I will ask for clarification or to write it down. Some people I have no problem understanding at all since they’re easy to lip-read. It can get tiring sometimes since I have to constantly lip-read and hear to understand everything so I don’t do well in hour long group meetings.

With sign language, I can look away for a few seconds or think about something else while someone is signing and still understand what they’re signing.

Ask me any questions you may have or want to know about and I’ll answer them in my next post. Even if it’s something like, “can deaf people play sports? watch TV? sing?”

This year was the first time they were hosting DeafNation World Expo in Las Vegas which turned out to be a huge success since 23,400 deaf people from 73 different countries all were there. Unfortunately Tyler and I couldn’t take the week off to be there but we were able to go for the weekend.

The drive there was boring since I was in a car full of boys! We got to our hotel and within minutes I was ready to go to the Deaf World Party which was hosted at Mandalay Bay. Who would’ve knew that the boys would take forever to get ready!? Rahul was being emo with his hair and the boys were swapping clothes/shoes. Finally we left after a while and got to the hotel. We had to pay $20 each to get in and I was hoping that it was going to be worth my money!

I was immediately overwhelmed at first seeing everyone again in the dark club. There were times when some people would come up to me and I couldn’t remember exactly where I knew them from….school in Washington, school in Arizona, college in New York, camp, etc. Luckily for me I didn’t embarrass myself!

I felt like I had a speech prepared for the whole weekend of how to sum up my life in a few sentences. The deaf community is so big that it’s hard to keep in touch with everyone.

It was really awesome seeing deaf people everywhere we went….in the bathroom, in line at a restaurant or club, & gambling next to us. Usually if deaf people see other deaf people in public – they usually ask in excitement, “You’re deaf too!?!” and then they introduce themselves because it’s not that often you see deaf people that you don’t know. In Las Vegas no one did that & I’m glad because I personally think it’s annoying when people approach me because we’re both deaf.

When Tyler and I normally see deaf people in public that we don’t know – we stop signing and then I make sure my hair is covering my hearing aid. I know this makes me sound like I’m a rude person but I’m not… I just don’t normally feel like talking about where I’m from, what school I went to, who else I know in the deaf community, and so on.

Anyways, there were so many other people we intended on seeing in Vegas but there wasn’t a lot of time and so many different groups & plans. We even picked up on some international sign language too and saw people signing in different languages too. It was fascinating seeing them sign and not even understand what they’re saying….but there are some signs that are obvious & similar to ours.

Haley and I’ve known each other since elementary school.
We hung out with Haley & her boyfriend, Chase, a lot that weekend.

We were leaving the club when the Deaf World Party ended and this
kid got his hand stuck in the elevator only seconds after I took this picture.
What an idiot and we had to push his hand out!

At the pool party (Treasure Island) with my Sigma Sigma Sigma sisters!

Catching up with old friends from high school.

Please ask me any questions you have about being deaf or the deaf culture. Anything and I’ll answer your questions!

 
I only got 2 and a half hours of sleep before waking up to shower and get ready to go to the hospital. I was so quiet waiting for my family to leave the house. Once I headed out the door to the truck, I felt queasy and sick. I carried a bowl with me all the way to the hospital and didn’t throw up. We didn’t arrive in time so I could see Allison, who just had her cochlear implant surgery a few days before by the same doctor. When we were registering, the lady printed out my wristband but it wasn’t my name so she had to print new ones out. That part made me nervous!

It was not too long after when the nurse came to bring all of us (my parents and sister were there with me) upstairs to the pre-operating room but my dad and sister had to wait in the waiting room. At this point I was getting so nervous, and because of that my blood pressure was too high. The nurses were so nice. They put an IV in my hand which hurt a little bit (and I hate needles!).

I was in my hospital bed waiting while my dad and sister came in to see me before my surgery. My mom left with the nurse and came back wearing a blue gown and a cap on. We got some giggles out of it and it was a nice brief distraction from being nervous.

The doctor then came in to tell me he had just seen Allison and that she wanted him to tell me Hi. His hair wasn’t combed which made me nervous if he was awake enough to do my surgery!

The nurse gave me a “cocktail” and put it through my IV. Within minutes I felt a good buzz like I had too much to drink. The nurses scrolled me down the hall to the operating room with mom on my side. I was trying so hard to comprehend everything that was going on but it seemed impossible with the cocktail in my system. I saw an interpreter in the room and she looked a bit disappointed because mom was already in the room to interpret for me. The nurse and doctor asked me to move onto the surgery bed and the last thing I remember is my mom signing to me. 

I woke up in the recovery room a few hours later around 10AM to a really nice nurse and her name was Dawn. Every time I woke up she would be in my face smiling. Her attitude helped me feel so much better. There were a lot of other people in the recovery room with their own nurse and they were not happy campers. Dawn said I was the happiest patient in the recovery room. I did not feel any pain but mostly pressure on my head from the bandage which was a very uncomfortable feeling. My mom and sister came in to see me a few times. Later around 1PM my sister came to see me by herself and told me that a friend was being mean to her about being at the hospital and not hanging out with her. This pissed me off and while I should have not… I sent her friend a message through her phone. While I was typing away on the phone Dawn quickly came over and looked concerned since my blood pressure shot up from being pissed off. So I decided to leave it at that and let my sister deal with it because after all I just got out of surgery and I should not even need to be dealing with this.

It wasn’t until around 4:30pm when I got my own private room so my mom could stay overnight with me. My dad had already took my sister home and came back around 5PM to see me for the first time since I got out of surgery. He brought me two mini-balloons on a stick with flowers. My mom’s company also sent me flowers which was really nice. Dad stayed with me while mom went outside to call some relatives to let them know how the surgery went. That’s how close our families are! I kept falling asleep on and off and asked for more medicine because I was afraid I would feel pain. It was a pain having to get up to go to the bathroom because mom had to unplug the machine that I was hooked up to then I had to walk to the bathroom with the machine. 

The worst pain I had was air bubbles coming out of my ear. Mom and I then decided to turn the lights off around 9:30-10pm to get some sleep. That didn’t work out very well since the nurses kept coming in about 10 times throughout the night to check my vitals and make sure everything was fine. They always had to check my wristband and ask me what my name was and my date of birth. Due to being half asleep and drugged up this was hard to keep up with.

I woke up the next morning to a bad ache in my upper back and that was probably from sleeping in one position the entire night. The nurse told us we were able to leave so I went to the bathroom to put my clothes on and all of a sudden my nose started bleeding. The doctor told me I could not blow my nose for a few days and this almost made me want to cry.

A nurse pushed me in the wheelchair down to the car and a lot of people were looking at me with pity. I wondered to myself why they were and then I remembered it was because of the bandage on my head. They probably thought I had brain tumor or a freak accident.

My whole experience was great which I am really grateful for since Allison had to do the surgery again since there were problems with her cochlear implant. The only time I did get sick was when they removed the bandage. I think I got scared of having it removed and seeing my stitches. I mean… seriously I thought someone was going to rip my ear off!

An old friend took this picture of me for a project she did in 2003

I have been often asked, “Do you wish you were hearing?”

…and I always proudly reply back, “No, I’m glad to be deaf”

Mainly because I can already hear with the help of my hearing aid and cochlear implant. I was very fortunate since I was born with a severe to profound hearing loss.

I can’t imagine having to hear every second of my life without an on/off switch. I have the choice to turn my hearing aid & cochlear implant off and not hear a single thing at night or whenever I want to, usually when I have a headache. However I must wear them everyday. I even used to pretend to ignore my parents when they called my name to ask me to do something for them and I’d blame it on dead batteries. (Sorry, Mom & Dad! I’m sure Lauren does that sometimes with you too!)

People assume I can talk and understand people just because I can hear. Not necessarily true. I heavily rely on lip-reading to understand what is being said. Some people even thought I’d be able to finally talk on the phone after getting my cochlear implant. Again, not true. I can hear voices/sounds coming out but I can’t make out to what people are saying on the other end because I can’t lip-read through the phone. If I was to call someone the person on the other end would have to only say – Hi, Yes, No, Okay, Bye for me to understand.

Although I wish I could understand people easily without having to lip-read and focus on what they’re saying that sometimes it’s a puzzle trying to figure out what people are saying. Hearing people can easily wander their eyes around and not have to have their eyes glued on the person talking. Tyler is so fortunate he can hear very well and had a lot of practice so he can talk on the phone & talk to people without having to look at them. I know I could be able to do this but with a lot of speech therapy.

I can’t fall asleep with my hearing aid on – every sound I hear wakes me up. I know hearing people can block out sounds if they wanted to. My sister and I both have slept through all of my Mom’s nightmares including one time when she ran around the house thinking my Dad was a murderer. Too bad I didn’t wake up to see that! 

 I’m glad I am deaf and sounds are not everything to me.

August 2006

I wear my hearing aid every day from my waking moment to the second I go to bed… unless I have a headache or want to ignore someone, haha. You get the point anyways.

I remember the day when my cochlear implant was activated for the first time which was a month after my surgery. We arrived at my doctor’s office and they led us to a small room. My parents and Tyler were with me with this lady, M, who did my activation.

M had me put my cochlear implant on and hooked it up to the computer. I had to tell her when I heard the beeping sounds and to tell her if it was comfortable, loud, or too loud/uncomfortable. After doing that for a few minutes M warned me she was going to turn my cochlear implant on for the first time.

My hearing aid was off so at this point I wasn’t hearing anything until M turned it on. My parents immediately started talking so I could hear them – it was almost like they were cooing at me. It quickly turned to be an unpleasant experience. I could hear my parents but their voices sounded so weird and I hated what I was hearing. Everything sounded mechanical.

M asked me to try talking so I could hear my own voice and I refused. I didn’t want to disappoint myself.

What if I hated how I sound? Was it really how hearing people hear me?

M told me she was going to turn up the volume and keep turning it up slowly until I told her it was uncomfortable. At this point I didn’t know what comfortable felt anymore. When M turned up the volume it sounded like a lion roaring but loud & louder.

We did some testings where she would say a month behind a piece of paper and I had to listen and tell her what month she was saying. I didn’t do too well and got a lot wrong unlike with my hearing aid I get them all correct. M assured me it was just the beginning and my brain was “waking up” and I would get used to it.

We left the office and I did not wear my cochlear implant. My parents & Tyler tried getting me to wear it so I can practice and get used to it. It was really unpleasant when I put my cochlear implant on as the roaring sound occurred for a minute then subsided.

I slowly got used to wearing it but I wanted to wear my hearing aid too and I did. I was hearing things that I could never hear before or was not that clear and sharp until now. With all the traffic noise going on I could even hear my blinkers!

There was one problem. I had to learn how to tell where the noises were coming from. With my cochlear implant – it makes me think all the sounds are coming from the left side. This was the main reason why I wear both my hearing aid and cochlear implant at the same time.

I had to get used to the fact that when my cochlear implant battery dies, it just dies/turns off without any warning. I hated this. My hearing aid doesn’t do this – it slowly dies so I have time to change my battery. The nice thing is I have rechargeable batteries for my cochlear implant that are good up to 8 hours so I have 8 hours before it will need to be recharged.

Tyler has helped me so much when I would constantly ask him what that noise is. I still do now sometimes. I’ve learned to love and hate some sounds. I hate the sound of people rubbing their hands. I can even hear Tyler doing that behind me in the grocery store! The other night Tyler was talking to his Dad on the speakerphone and I could hear his Dad talking from the other room. I’m always amazed at the sounds I hear all the time.

Just because I can hear sounds clearly now does not mean I can 100% understand everything now. I’ve had some people tell me that they couldn’t wait to have a phone conversation with me after my activation. Learning how to understand people on the phone is a difficult thing since I can’t lipread through the phone…obviously.

I can call people and do all the talking but then I’d have to hang up before they even talk. I do that sometimes with Tyler if he’s not responding to his text messages. I’d call him and say what I need to say then hang up and he would text me back. Lame I know, but it works!

Feel free to ask me any questions or for clarification if I confused anyone on this long post!

When I say this I always point to my ear. I don’t know why I do this but it’s a habit. I can hear chattering and background noises but my problem is I don’t know when someone is talking to me.

Often times Tyler would sign to me, “That person just asked how you were doing today!”

Usually at this point, Tyler will say something to that person and make conversation with them. I worry this happens a lot when I’m shopping alone. They might think I’m a total bitch for ignoring them.

One time I was at a fast food restaurant and ordered something. While waiting for my order, I went to fill up my cup and by the time I turned around I saw an employee slam an order back on the counter and whispered angrily to another employee. I quickly realized that she must had come up behind me and tried to give me my order. I went up to the counter and told her “Excuse me… I’m Deaf” and she quickly smiled and apologized.

I can understand people if they’re talking directly at me and not talk through their teeth because that makes it impossible for me to read their lips. I’m sure other Deaf people can relate to this.

Have ever met or seen a Deaf person before?